Some days I wonder if you’re still proud of me. During those days it’s hard for me to give you reasons which may convince you to actually be it. Some days I’m selfish, immature and capricious. Some days I’m not even that kind of guy that people want to see and admire.
That’s why I wonder what would happen if you even balanced that part of me… Would it be heavier? I couldn’t even describe to you my clearest and attractive component. The easy thing to respond would be just yes, that you’re still proud of me and that you admire me nevertheless; that the balance made you realize that the positive part was heavier than the rest. But you know easy things don’t usually convince me and some days (more than what you think) I need you, despite this being the most selfish thing that I could possibly do: I’m aware of how much I need you now that I don’t have you.
Some days I would go back in time to change some things, since I don’t regret what I did, but what I didn’t.
I must admit to you that I hate “what if’s” since you left us and since then I’ve learned how important hugging and kissing is. I must admit to you that I don’t want to keep anything inside of me that needs to be said out loud.And that’s why I’m going to tell you the utmost truth that I have: I love you.
